A hallmark of parenting is guilt. Am I scarring my kids? Did I react correctly? Am I doing enough?
My latest source of guilt has been surrounding traditions. I want my kids to have wonderful childhood memories of holidays and the traditions that go along with them. At 4, my oldest is definitely at an age where he understands the significance of holidays and traditions and is creating real, recallable memories. So I am feeling the pressure to make the holidays really count.
Thanksgiving seems like a good candidate to experiment with new traditions. No gifts are exchanged, you don’t need to schedule around any church services, and the main focus of the day is food. Most importantly, the message of gratitude and community behind Thanksgiving provides many opportunities for creating meaningful traditions.
But not all traditions have to be “meaningful.” Especially when including young kids, it’s a good tactic to mix in some silliness. Keep things fresh. Have fun.
I have brainstormed traditions that you can start this Thanksgiving that require relatively little effort, because to be a tradition, it needs to be doable year after year. These are my ideas, but really anything that works for your family that you can see doing every Thanksgiving is a good tradition to start.
Thanksgiving Traditions
1. Donate to a food drive
Thanksgiving is a holiday that is focused on food. For those who are food-insecure, Thanksgiving can be a sad day. For those of us who have blessings to share, it’s important to share them on Thanksgiving. An easy way to do this is to donate food to a local food drive that might be held by your church, synagogue, or other community organization. Participating in a food drive also demonstrates the true meaning of Thanksgiving to your kids so they grow up less concerned about the turkey and stuffing and more focused on being thankful for all they have.
2. Make a monetary donation
If you can’t get it together to donate food to a Thanksgiving food drive, consider giving a monetary donation to an organization that helps food-insecure people. Find a local soup kitchen or food pantry and write a check. They’ll be super grateful, as will the people who are fed by the food bought with your donation.
3. Watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade
This is one of those silly traditions, but it’s one that has really stuck with me, anyway. We always watched the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade on Thanksgiving morning when I was growing up. We would have it on the TV all morning, excited by the floats and the balloons. I was always particularly impressed by the Rockettes and their high kicks, and it was (and still is) officially the Christmas season for me when Santa made his way down 34th street. It’s a must watch for me!
4. Participate in a Turkey Trot
Full disclosure here: we are not a Turkey Trot family. But that doesn’t mean you’re not! It can be invigorating to begin your Thanksgiving by bundling up and running a 5K. It encourages being part of a larger community and often involves donation of either money or food as part of participating. Two turkeys, one trot!
5. Volunteer
Although perhaps the heaviest lift of the traditions on this list, volunteering your time on or around Thanksgiving is likely to be the most meaningful. It’s certainly the most concrete way to teach your kids how much they have to be grateful for and the importance of helping those in need.
6. Make a special recipe
Of all the ideas on my list, this is the biggest no-brainer. For a food-centric holiday, it’s not rocket science to make a tradition out of preparing the meal. Make it more special by getting your kids involved in preparing one of your most special family recipes. In our family, I still make my mom’s sweet potatoes every year for Thanksgiving, so this is our special recipe tradition.
7. Write a gratitude list
The traditional form of creating a gratitude list is to go around the table and have everyone say one thing they are thankful for. This is definitely a good option here, but if you have stage fright or a family who doesn’t like to participate in activities, you can also do this one more privately. Grab your kids, a pen, and a sheet of paper, and fill it up with all the things that make your life great. A worthwhile way to spend some time on Thanksgiving for sure!
8. Football
You can tick this one off the list in a couple of ways. For the majority of us, you can watch a game on TV. There are now 3 games every Thanksgiving, so you’re guaranteed to be able to watch one, regardless of what time your family sits down to eat. For the over-achievers out there, you can organize a game of touch football with your family. Pit the kids against the adults, the boys against the girls, or let it be a free-for-all. Just make sure you have bandaids at the ready!
9. Take a family photo
I really like this idea. I’m so excited about it, that I’m going to force this one on my family this year. What a great way to document your family over the years. This becomes especially important as our parents age. We can always look back on these photos and remember happy days spent together. Who cares if the kids have cranberry stains on their shirts and your husband has had to unbutton his pants? This is life!
10. Start decorating for Christmas
Now, I’m not here to judge. If you put up your Christmas decorations on November 1st, more power to you. If you choose instead to start that process on Christmas Eve, you do you. Personally, I like to transition from Thanksgiving to Christmas by starting to decorate for Christmas after the Thanksgiving meal each year. Once the food has been eaten, leftovers are packed away, dishes are washed, and the kids are in bed, go down to the basement (or up to the attic) and pull out those boxes. We typically save the tree and the outdoor decorations for the day after Thanksgiving (a much better use of my time than going to mall on Black Friday), but I like to start with the small things on Thanksgiving night. Pop the stockings on the mantle, swap your kitchen towels, and get the Christmas tablecloth onto the dining table. Keep the festivities going!
What traditions does your family have on Thanksgiving? My mom guilt would love to add more to our repertoire!
If you want to start some Christmas traditions while you’re at it, here are eight to think about incorporating into your Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.